Since I found my black lady in my previous meditation and brought her to my soul chakra, I have been talking a lot with her, of course during a meditation.
Let me explain step by step. The first day, I thought that I was united with her. But the next day, when I went up to my soul chakra, she remained there. She said that she needed to talk to me and it is highly confidencial.
Yes, I calmly and confidently answered. Then we moved to the beautiful Zen garden. Only an elegant swan is with us.
She started to tell her story.
I am often called an evil woman associated with taboo subjects such as sexuality, power, and the occult. People often call me “the Sexual Addiction Demon Lilith Succubus and Incubus!”. (Yes! Satchi, you called her this, right?) But it is not me, but delusion. It is the delusion of people who think I am the most dangerous creature to ever walk the earth. These false images exist everywhere.
I was created with the soil of Earth at the same time and from the same earth as Adam himself in Jewish mythology. I was Adam's first wife who was an equal partner to him.
However, my husband wanted me to be wonderfully satisfying and soothing to his heart, body and ego. He asked me to walk quietly beside him and make him feel needed, and responsible, like he is fulfilling his manly role. It means that I will allow myself to be tamed.
But it was not the real meaning of equality. So, I refused to submit to him. I wanted to be treated as an equal and refused to be subservient to Adam. This led to a conflict between them, and I was kicked out of the Garden of Eden by him. However, it is well known that I left Adam and the Garden of Eden, not that he kicked me out.
The surroundings suddenly became brighter.
The black lady paused and looked at me as if she heard my voice in my mind. I thought it was just like my divorce story. I experienced it like her. She nodded at me. “I screamed out from the bottom of the subconscious mind of the ocean on the edge of Neptune,” she said. “You are lucky to be born when Neptune and Black Moon Lilith are in conjunction. That is why I could reach out to you. I nudged you to go through a divorce unconsciously. You did and found me. Moreover, you released me. But many people cannot. Because millions of Lilith, the archetype of female are imprisoned in the Womb of Earth. Without them, women can't find real equality.”
The elegant swan was swiming in snow.
After I was kicked out of the Garden, I was said to have become a figure associated with darkness, rebellion, and independence. I was demonized in later Jewish folklore, often depicted as a seductress and a threat to newborn children and women in childbirth. These false images and rumours suppressed me deeper and deeper. Eventually, I reached the Womb of Earth, as a shelter.
However, I exist in everybody as representing the darker, more primal aspects of the feminine archetype, and it is associated with themes of independence, rebellion, and sexuality in all human beings. I provide insight into a person's unconscious desires and motivations and can be used to gain a deeper understanding of one's self and their relationships.
She smiled beautifully. I noticed that she had a face now. The more she expresses herself in my soul chakra, the more beautiful she becomes. For a week, she provided insights into how I can work with and integrate her energy. I just listened to her and asked my mind computer to take all the notes. We are learning together.
One day, she seemed satisfied enough, so I went up to Logos with her and we met my higher self in the Pagoda near the ocean. There was my masculinity whom I found after the Temaskal sweat lodge ritual last summer. Since I released him in my Antahkarana, I have seen him from time to time in this Pagoda. We all sat together making a small circle and meditating. We were connected to our chakras horizontally, just as Satchi taught me.
During connecting each other's chakras, we balanced all traits associated with healthy masculinity from him, such as assertiveness, strength, confidence, and independence, with the dark or shadow side of femininity, such as internalized oppression which leads to self-doubt, and self-criticism including a lack of confidence in embracing our authentic selves.
Dark Lilith highlighted the repression of emotions I may still internalize societal messages that devalue femininity or promote harmful stereotypes. She also explained what is perfectionism and self-sacrifice which I did in my previous marriage. I had felt overwhelmed by the pressure to constantly meet unrealistic standards of perfection as a wife and prioritize the needs of my ex-husband over my well-being.
She said that we must not inadvertently perpetuate harmful gender stereotypes or engage in behaviours that undermine other women, such as judgment, competition, or exclusion. This could stem from societal conditioning and internalized biases which label her as a demon woman.
I gave her a glance of respect. Now she was shining as a prominent activist.
My healthy masculinity was sending the energy of self-assuredness, leadership, and the ability to set boundaries and assert oneself respectfully and confidently to me. He also sent involving nurturing qualities such as empathy, compassion, and emotional intelligence. I was abserbing those traits through my chakras while I felt secure.
We were connecting and sharing all traits in meditation at my soul in my meditation with my higher self. It was awesome and I felt exiting from my body and melting into a high-dimensional world. It sounded a bit bizarre, something like sharing the gigantic brain and all chakras with supporting a diverse and inclusive understanding of me, Yuko.
After a week of Shikantaza meditation in my soul, eventually, we decided to travel to the womb of the earth together. My masculinity said that he could guide us to go there.
He explained that the Temascal the sweat lodge was a virtual womb of Mother Earth. There, I sat on the ground in the complete dark and the Mexican Shaman brought burning stones we collected in the woods. He poured herb tea on those. Hissing sounds and steam occurred. The temperature went up high and red stones were imposing. It was the womb of Mother Earth and I found him, my masculinity at the bottom of my canyon in my heart chakra.
Now my masculinity asked me to imagine as if I was in Tamaskal. So, I did. Then, we moved into there, the womb of Mother Earth! It was a gigantic dark hollow. The black Moon Lilith said that there were many women like me before. Yes, there were thousands of women standing still. They looked like Army Terracotta soldiers in China. Wow, it was true what my Lilith told me.
I put my hands inside of a woman nearby. She was made of soil. I took it from the place of the base chakra. I knead it with my hands. It gave me so a soothing feeling. In return, I connected it to my base chakra and shaped it. Then, dropped into the centre of the Earth. It was baked and turned into a beautiful shining base chakra. I place it inside of the women. I did the same for the second and third chakras. Then I took the soil from her crown chakra. I kneaded, connected to my crown chakra. I shaped it and baked it. It became a shining crown. I put it on her head and I aligned it to the universe. Then, I did the same for the 6th and 5th chakras.
The woman’s body started glowing like a rainbow. I joined the energy from the base chakra and the energy from the crown chakra through all the chakra at her heart chakra. It is a magic moment, Satchi. I could give life for this woman. Isn’t it nice! Now she was alive, but couldn’t move. Because of her stone socks.
I did the same as I did for my Black Moon Lilith. I put both hands on the stone socks and transferred the energy. Then, I cut them out and I dropped them to the centre of the earth. It transformed into a shining creature with wings. I returned them to the place where the stone socks were. Then, they became her feet. The woman looked really happy. Then, I applied the seven steps. I gathered minions, fought with BM, and found a controller. All transformed into angels full of sparkling light.
I cut the 10 chakras in a circle above the crown chakras. I dropped them into the centre of the earth and they transformed into glowing chakras. I placed them above the crown chakra. I cut the millions of chakras from the 10th and dropped them into the centre of the earth. They transformed into angels and they flew up to the ceiling of the womb. They went through it and I could reach the infinity. Under the mark of infinity, there was a large tablet written in ancient letters. I had an intuition that It must be a contract between Demon and men who were their fathers, husbands and kings…. These women were victims.
I put my palm on it and scanned all the letters which I couldn’t read at all. All the letters were in my palm. I kneaded with my power and squeezed it into a small ball. Then, I dropped it into the centre of the earth. Then…. Amazingly shining light rose like a rising sun. It melted the ceiling of the womb like chocolate. All of a sudden, all soil women like “Terracotta soldiers” were released like flying angels. Flakes of light fell everywhere, even on me. I was covered with flakes of light. I was satisfied and went to sleep.
For a couple of weeks, my masculinity brought me to many hollows and I released thousands of soil women. Strangely, those activities made me feel good and connect to the universe well. I understood that I was removing blockages for collective consciousness which include me. I was happy to help other women in meditation. Isn't it wonderful?
A few days later, I had a lucid dream early morning. It was the most vivid and strange lucid dream I've ever had. My ex-husband woke me up. I was sitting on the bench looking at the Alps like high snowcap mountains. I knew this town. It was the town where I found the secret library. My ex-husband was very happy and told me that he decided to return a whale which he stole from the planet, Neptune. He carried the whale on the truck and asked me to go with him. I agreed him.
Then, I was woken up again. I was in the bathtub filled with cold water in the dark. I felt cold water like real. I felt cold, but I knew that I stayed in it for a long time since I was a small child. I stayed there for a while and decided to get out. I stood up and I realised that I was wearing a green dress which I made just before I left Japan, it could be about 20 years ago. I created this dress with a strong will not to come back to Japan once I left.
It was soaked with water. I stood up and got out of the bathtub. I walked to the sliding door which was common in Japan. I slid the door to the left. There was my mother. She looked at me with a happy face and said that finally, you decided to come out. She hugged me and said, “Let’s go home”. We got out of a tall futuristic building and walked down the high slope of the road. There were Japanese houses on both sides of the road and we found a small paper box before the wooden house. I looked inside. There are baby tigers! Then, I woke up. It was 8:30....in the morning.
I felt cold water on my skin when I got up. It was so real. The real feeling of cold reminded me the day I swam in the river. Then, I blued a cup of strong coffee and enjoyed it slowly watching over the window. It was snowing. Then I went to work.
That night, I sat on the bed. I meditated. I was looking forward to going back to the lucid dream which I had early morning. I and my ex-husband were on Planet Neptune. I apologized for stealing their whale and returned it to King Neptune. He looked glad and he said that I completed one of my missions which found the alien who stole the whale and ran into Earth. Then, my mission is to return it to King Neptune. The alien thief seemed like my ex-husband. By the way, he has a sun and Pluto in conjunction in his natal chart. You can see his chart below.
When I returned the whale to the king Neptune, the whale transformed into a white Beluga. It looked at me and started talking to me with frequency-contained vibration. It sounded like tuning lower strings for string instruments in the orchestra. It was truly awesome that I could communicate with this white shining creature. It has a beautiful transparency energy.
Beluga wanted to give me a special psychic power to access all kinds of dreams, ideals, and imagination. Because this ability allows me to embrace spiritual growth and self-transformation of my raw primal energy into a force for change and liberation.
Also, with this power, I can raise my black moon, Lilith of highest expressions and bring forth a deep, spiritual connection with my white moon that transcends earthly relationships. They will dance together to urge me to spiritual awakening and liberation. Then I will embark on a spiritual quest for the deepest realms of the subconscious. My black moon is located opposite the white moon like twins in my natal chart. Because of this opposition, they never merge but can find a perfect balance in dance harmoniously and empathically. This special psychic power helps me to sense where I can meet a perfect balance between opposite natures.
This harmony also created Black and White moon dancing waters down negative aspects caused by Neptune conjunct Lilith synastry in my natal chart. When Neptune and Black Moon Lilith are in conjunction in my natal chart, it can indicate a complex and intense energy related to the themes of illusion, fantasy, and the subconscious mind. But now with this power, both aspects are no longer fighting but rather collaborating to grow, heal, and shine my inner light. They embrace my spiritual journey and navigate the vague realm of dreams and illusions.
There, I have a strong connection between my deep, hidden desires as Black Moon Lilith and my spiritual and imaginative side from Neptune. I may have a profound sensitivity to the unseen and intangible aspects of life and there is a risk I might be drawn to mystical or esoteric pursuits, but Beluga will guard me to show the light.
Beluga the mystical creature hugged me and said, and it said, “You are not merely human beings having a spiritual experience, but spiritual beings living a human journey. Don’t forget!”
I said goodbye to Beluga and King Neptune. I must go back to another lucid dream where I was in a cold bathtub. I must bring her to my Soul.
But I din’t know where she was. The place where I found her in my lucid dream was very new to me. A tall building, a traffic road and a steep path I found tiger cubs were unfamiliar places to even my senses. So, I asked my mind computer where I found her. It answered, “She is at the entrance of the hazy realm of dreams and illusions. She is about to hide in her imagination again.”
No! I need her to explore that ambiguous realm of dreams and illusions as a navigator. I decided to use this new ability Beluga gave me to access her imagination. I imagined her. She might tend to have emotional restraint, self-discipline, and a reserved or cautious approach to expressing feelings in front of my mother who trusts discipline and structure. She highly likely has emotional vulnerability and issues with self-nurturing. She might be clever. So, she might try to hide in the place I don’t want to look at.
Yes, I know that it’s fear. I knew I still had fear somewhere in my unconscious mind. It sometimes came out when I was fighting against my teacher in Kendo. And he noticed it. Miena who did a psychic reading for me also noticed it. However, to be honest, I had a hesitation to look at it and go there.
At that moment, just as I thought about my fear, I remembered the faces of tiger cubs. Yes, she will be with tiger cubs. Speaking of tigers, there is a very famous Chinese proverb, “If you do not enter the tiger's cave, you will not catch its cub.” Ok, all linked. I understood what my lucid dream meant to tell me.
These tiger cubs are my fear. I focused on my fear which is dark, cold and horrible. I tried to find the tiger cubs. Yes, I found them. I went closer. A person was holding them. Yes, her! I found her!
I talked to her. She wore a wet green dress. I told her, let’s go to a warm place! How about near fire? I suggest to her these tiger cubs want to be near fire. She looked at me and nodded.
I held a hand with her and flew up to my soul. When I looked down at my fear, it changed into the high building I saw in my lucid dream. Probably, my mother was still in it. What should I do with this building? My fear was the high building. Yes, this was an illusion, so I decided to apply the seven steps for sure.
Surprisingly, I encountered Demon and fought against him. He created illusions reflecting the impact of societal expectations as a good mother, good wife and good daughter. And he had implanted this delusio into my mother, my grandmothers, my grandmother and all female ancestors as blockages.
I carefully removed blockages one by one from my timeline. The ability Beluga gave me was so useful to absorb illusions like using a magnet from my timeline. Then, I dropped all into the centre of the earth.
I was watching these alchemical transformations with my white moon, black moon and healthy masculinity. We all felt that the old curse was broken. A blight silver moon came out and rose to my Soul chakra. It was a waxing moon. It was the shape of the moon when I was born and when I was with my masculinity in front of the big fire after Temaskal.
There was a huge strong fire in my Soul chakra just like after the Temaskal ritual. In the night with a waxing moon, we were standing on the muddy ground in the middle of a storm. The strong swirling wind blew flame and rain. I took off a wet green dress from my white moon and dried her in the middle of the four elements, fire, water, earth and air. She smiled and started dancing with Dark Moon.
They were dancing while embodying the essence of each element, weaving a tapestry of movement that reflects the interconnectedness of the natural world. It was a breathtaking moment and my masculinity was holding my hands and my higher self was holding my other hand too.
We three were watching the dance. The white and dark moon were like twins. They invoked the element of fire, moving with passion and intensity, embodying the flickering flames and the transformative power of heat. Their movements were vibrant, bold, and expressive, evoking the energy of creation and destruction. The dance became a mesmerizing display of fiery motion, igniting the spirit and awakening the primal force within.
Now they were transitioning to the element of water. Their movements became fluid and graceful, mirroring the ebb and flow of the tides, and the deep, mysterious currents of emotion. Their gestures evoked the gentle caress of rain, the powerful force of a rushing river, and the tranquil depths of an ancient ocean. The dance became a meditation on the ever-changing nature of emotions and the healing power of surrender.
Now we were all grounded with them in the element of earth. We sat, crossed our legs, and closed our eyes. We felt strength, stability, and connection to the land. We are in meditation deliberating and grounded, evoking the solidity of mountains, the fertility of soil, and the resilience of ancient forests. We honoured the nurturing embrace of the earth, expressing gratitude for the abundance and sustenance it provides.
Finally, our mind took flight, embracing the element of air with lightness and grace. We mimic the swirling winds, the gentle rustling of leaves, and the boundless expanse of the sky. We become a testament to the power of breath, intellect, and freedom, as the meditators surrender to the ethereal currents of the air, embodying the spirit of inspiration and clarity.
I opened my eyes in my meditation and the four elements intertwine and harmonize. We became a living prayer, honouring the sacred energies that shape our existence. When I felt the universal rhythm of life, I opened my eyes to reality. I thanked God and I slept.
댓글